Christian Pooch
No serious joke (and there's yet another oxymoron) site about the English language could be complete without a collection of puns. Here's one of them.
A fundamentalist Christian couple felt it important to own an equally fundamentally Christian pet, so they went shopping.
At a kennel specializing in this particular breed, they found a dog they liked quite a lot. When they asked the dog how many Apostles there were, he responded with twelve barks. When they asked the dog to fetch the Bible, he did it in a flash. When they instructed him to look up Psalm 23, he complied equally fast, using his paws with dexterity. They were impressed, purchased the animal, and took it home.
That night they had friends over. As Christians, of course they had to resist the urge to be proud and boastful, but nevertheless they were so stirred by their new fundamentalist dog, that they called him to show off just a little bit.
The friends were also very impressed, and asked whether he could also do any usual dog tricks. This stopped the couple cold, as they hadn't thought about "normal" tricks. "Well", they said, "let's try this." Once more they called the dog, and they clearly pronounced the command, "Heel!"
Quick as a flash, the dog jumped up, put his paw on the man's forehead, closed his eyes in concentration, and bowed his head.
